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Dating for intellectuals

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Posted January 12, Reviewed by Jessica Schrader.

Embrace your intelligence. Yet we all vary from each other on everything from eye color to sexual orientation to political orientation.

And we vary in—choose your term—cognitive ability, reasoning power, intelligence. Search for peers. Intellectual compatibility is more important to a relationship than some people realize.

Online dating what to say

To that end, dating sites can be useful. Keep intelligence in mind also as you decide whom to respond to, how you respond, and how you react to their responses. In-person opportunities? Consider taking an in-person class that would attract intelligent people; perhaps a liberal arts course at a university extension, an advanced financial planning class, for example.

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And afterward, usually people hang around to chat. You might too.

Also, ask friends to set you up with people they sense will be intellectually and otherwise compatible. The stereotype is that men are made insecure by smart women.

Good men will treasure you for your good mind. So make your intelligence core to your relationship, from first interaction onward.

For example, you might have deep-dive discussions of personal as well as societal issues, for example, the pros and cons of Trump's policies from liberal, conservative, and libertarian perspectives. You might go to plays, a book club, and get together with intellectually compatible friends.

About the author

Of course, unnecessary showing off is ill-advised but, like everyone in relationships, you want to be loved for who you are, and your intelligence is an important part of that. Be who you are.

Romantic relationshipsincluding marriages, too often break up, often painfully. I read this post aloud on YouTube.

This is part of a series of tips for smart people. Marty Nemko, Ph. Marty Nemko Ph. How To Do Life. About the Author.

Read Next. Back Psychology Today.

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